Phoenix Wedding Photographer

The Swimsuit Panic Epidemic | by jennyp

That harsh overhead fluorescent lighting, the tiny dressing room that feels as though it’s being pumped full of hot stale air, a swimsuit in the size you thought you wore, and your image in the mirror—just a hideous beast with ripples and dimples and folds and creases on pasty stretches of skin that hasn’t seen daylight in a year.  Before the tears you’re fighting fall down your cheeks you RIP the hated pieces of spandex off your poor, insulted body and repeat in your head, “I just won’t swim this year.  I just won’t swim this year.”   It’s not just you sweetie, it’s all of us.

My darlings you’re not alone!  No one, not a size 2 or a size 12 or a size 20, enjoys the day when you have to go try on swimsuits.  Do they shrink the fitting rooms pre-summer?  Do they double check to make sure the lights are literally doubling as a torture device in war-torn countries?  Is there a man behind the dressing room actually shrinking suits before you put them on?  Yes.  Let’s just say yes to these things and work with these harsh and unfair conditions.  We can get through it, we’re strong women!

So let’s just break it down:  different bodies need different suits.   My big sister is never going to be able to pull off the tiny bikinis I own, and I’ll never (sadly ever) fill out a swimsuit top like she does.  These are just the facts, and we need to embrace our figures and work with what we’ve got because we’ve ALL got SOMETHING good!

Curvy Cuties

  • Halter-top bikinis can be a good choice by offering support, while providing some sexy cleavage too. Look for styles that are banded around the midriff and can be tied in back and around the neck. This style will give you some lift and will allow you to make adjustments for a personal fit.
  • Look for one-piece swimsuits with some structure in the bust, such as soft foam cups or at least, a shelf bra. Straight cut bust styles such as a classic tank can look clean and sporty. Wide shoulder straps will also be much more comfortable than thin, spaghetti straps.
  • Avoid strapless bandeau tops and those tiny, tri-tops that offer minimal coverage. Again, make sure to get a suit where you can order the top and bottom sizes separately.

Boyish Bodied Beauties

  • Look for tops with a touch of padding, or an under wire, demi-bra style that makes the most of a beautiful, dainty, bust line. Try to find a top with adjustable straps at shoulders and around back so that you can tighten and adjust things, to help fill out the top line.
  • You are very lucky that you have the body to wear those cute, ruffled tops that are so hot right now, so go for it. And as for bandeau tops, only you can wear those well. You can also show off in those tiny, tri-tops that the big busted girls only dream about.
  • Avoid tops with too much fabric or have a poor fit. Opt for separates, where you can choose your top and bottom separately.

Tummy Hiding Temptresses

  • Add vertical lines to your bathing suit using stripes, piping, patterns and seams. Select swimwear with dark side panels that curve into your waist. If you are wearing two-piece bikinis or tankinis, choose bikini bottoms in a dark color with a high waistband.
  • Find swimwear with a high Lycra content. Look for slimming bathing suits like the Miraclesuit that use hidden-control panels to reduce tummy bulges.
  • If you have a larger tummy avoid suits whose bottoms dig into your stomach, resist wearing tankinis or any swimwear with belts, bows or ties around your waistline.

Rear-end Minimizing Mamas

  • Have more detail at the bustline. A woman with an ample rear end should use v-necks and vertical stripes to lengthen her torso. Choose a halter styled- bathing suit with a light colored top and a darker bottom.
  • A strapless bathing suit is perfect for the pear shaped woman because it balances the figure by creating a firm horizontal line across the body. Wear empire-wasted swimwear and suits with an ombre pattern to take a few inches off your hips.
  • The worst bathing suits for bottom-heavy women include too-tight bottoms that dig into your flesh.

Tips for us All

  • Wear darker colors on areas that you would like to reduce or slim.
  • Prints and patterns with darker backgrounds are more slimming.
  • Reflective and shiny suits add pounds to even the smallest frames. If you like shimmery fabrics select a matte suit with shiny details.
  • Lots of fabric on a swimsuit makes the woman appear larger: not smaller.

Tips from Jenny P on Swimsuit Shopping:

  • Don’t go when you’re having an ugly day!  If you woke up and your hair was off, you hate the outfit you somehow pulled on, and you’re 90% certain you gained 20 lbs in your sleep–don’t go near a mall with swimsuits!
  • Grab a few sizes and IGNORE THE TAG!  Who cares if the tag says “bigger than I thought” if the image in the mirror says “fits perfectly!”
  • Pick a few things you wouldn’t normally try.  You always buy black?  Try on navy blue, mix it up, you might be surprised.
  • Ask the salespeople for help.  They know their stock and they know their products.  Utilize these people!
  • Have (if possible) some fun.  Remember: you buy a swimsuit so you can play in water!  That’s SO FUN!
  • Know I’m hugging you as you try them on, cry a little, curse the ocean, and gape at the large price of such little fabric….

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May 28, 2010 - 11:19 am

The Summer Needs List » Kimberly Jarman Photography - […] bridge-jumping in.  I did an entire article on finding a suit for your body earlier this year (The Swimsuit Panic Epidemic) , so let’s not reiterate the whole thing, let’s just say this:  it’s summer, you need a […]

April 2, 2010 - 9:51 am

jennyp - Aw thank you Heather! And I don’t buy it, I’ve seen you in person lady, I have no doubt you ROCK the swimsuit department! Mega hottie mchotterton. I think I forgot one tip: go right after a good happy hour 🙂

April 2, 2010 - 9:41 am

Heather at Outstanding Occasions - Jenny P,
Just wanted to let you know what a great addition you are to the Kimberly Jarman team. Loving Fridays with you on the blog! As for the bathing suit, well…life just isn’t the same after kids, so me and the bathing suit are going to battle this year again!

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